I need some rain. I really need it to pour tomorrow, to wake up with water sheeting down my windoes. It’s too dry. I know it’s not healthy to get stressed about the weather.
Today I want to write about the rain, as though it is a kind of invocation, a rain dance.
My doctor is from India and is trained in Ayurveda. He is very good at a party trick I call ‘guess what horrendous foods I’ve been eating from my alarming symptoms’. He’s like Rainman but for digestive complaints and rashes. He’s my guru. He says I hate the dry weather and wind because I am the dry wind…Vata. I should eat warm, cooked, wet foods. mmmm….wet foods… no crackers, no nuts, no crisps… sad, really, but it’s lucky I’m fond of dahl for dinner and porridge for breakfast.
I loved painting clouds and stormy scenes back in the day. I got really abstract at the end but I do love painting the real thing. I just wasted an hour looking for old photos of my artwork. sigh. Today, for the first time in a long time, I miss painting.
I feel…like getting and going to see a too-loud band. I also feel like being 18 again. I am buzzing with energy.
I need...to never speak to a call centre again. Ever. I need to be quiet.
I forgive…myself for all the stupid things I’ve said and done. I need some success. I need to feel like I’m moving forward in my work.
I celebrate…the fact that it’s Friday and I survived another week. Dramatic. I celebrate My family tonight with a special meal.
I release...the grip I have on time and place…and the need to be perfect.
I trust…the process.
Happy Weekend. I hope you get what you need and a bit of what you want.
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